1. So Cute, It’s Scary

    We went to the local Halloween superstore for some supplies. While we were browsing, my wife Patti noticed they had a “Boys Career” section, complete with doctor, fireman and astronaut costumes.

    We thought it would be interesting to compare the boys’ choices with the choices the girls were given in their career section. Would the girls get equivalent options? Or would they be offered nurse, secretary and cheerleader instead?

    The good news is that I was wrong. The girls were not saddled with nurses and secretaries as their only career paths. The bad news is there was no “Girls Career” section at all. None.

    They did, however, have an entire section — I am not making this up — labeled “Flutter Fairy.” This was separate from the regular fairy section. I’m guessing because there is more “fluttering” involved.

    What message does that send to girls about who their heroes are? About who they should aspire to be?

    Looking more carefully at the costumes, we compared the “Boys Fright” section the “Girls Fright” section. The boys were given some truly terrifying options. Freddy Krueger, Jason, Bloody Skeleton, and more.

    Over on the girls’ side, there was literally nothing that was legitimately scary. From  “Feisty Fairy” to a tutu-clad “Zomberina,” real terror was in short supply.

    I mentioned it to Patti. “None of these costumes are scary in any real way. They all are cute.”

    A passing employee chimed in. “Most of the scary costumes involve a mask. Girls don’t like to cover their face. They want people to see them,” she added helpfully.

    The superheroes aisle was not much better. Spider-Girl wore a tutu and had a “princess wand.” Batgirl was clad in head to toe hot pink. There were dozens of choices to help a girl look cute. But what if she wants to look tough? What if she wants to look scary? What if she wants to look professional?

    It was easy for me to draw a line in my mind between row after row of costumes that tell little girls that the only thing that is important is that they look “cute” to the row after row of costumes that tell young women that the only way society values them is if they look “sexy.”

    Halloween is my favorite holiday. I love the spookiness, the costumes and the creativity. I’ve dressed up in everything from silly, to creative, to scary. Hell, if I could pull off sexy, I might go for that, too — but I really appreciate the fact that when I go to the store, I have other choices.

    I hope that someday my girls will be able to say the same.

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